Last week's number: 321.6 pounds
This week's number: 317.2 pounds (my lowest weight in five years!)
Week-to-week loss: 4.4 pounds
Net loss: 33.4 pounds
Given the challenges I've had over the past week, I'm very proud of this number. That said, it could be better! Now that I've unearthed the treadmill, I intend on using it. Tomorrow night, it's on!
(Yes, I've said that earlier. But this time it's a sure thing!)
As I reach the last hole in my belt (going in the right direction!) I'm focusing on goals I have for the future. Beyond getting a new belt, that is. Some of these are directly related to my weight loss; others are more personally or professionally oriented. Without further ado, here goes (at least the G-rated stuff, anyway):
Ongoing:
Make sure that the needs of my family are completely met, regardless of other activities.
Read the following every month:
All required reading for classes
All technical journals for the month
Follow along with my church's Bible reading schedule
At least two novels: one SF or fantasy (currently On Basilisk Station by David Weber) and one literary classic (currently Gravity's Rainbow by Thomas Pynchon)
Two telescope observing sessions each month (weather and other scheduling demands permitting)
Within the next week:
Establish a daily schedule
Complete all outstanding household repairs (including kids' toys)
Finish the garage so I'll have my work/study area ready
Clear my side of the bedroom of everything that should be in my work/study area
Use the treadmill at least 20 minutes per day for 5 days out of 7
Climb the stairs at work 3 times per day
Within the next six months:
A net loss of 60 pounds or greater (62.5 pounds would put me halfway to my goal)
Use the treadmill at least 30 minutes per day, every day that it is available to me
Be able to run at least one mile
Complete the F-106 Delta Dart model I started in 2006
Complete my Puzz3D Millennium Falcon
Within the next year:
Reach my goal weight of 225 pounds (my weight when I graduated college)
Be able to run at least three miles
One hour of exercise (cardio and weight training) at least 5 days/week
Complete all core courses in my Masters program
Get my bike refurbished, and join the church riding club
Complete my Medieval Clock kit
End of 2014:
Finish my Masters program
Publish at least one technical article besides my thesis
Maintain my weight at 225 or lower
Compete in the Spartan Sprint (3 miles, 10 obstacles)
Attend at least one SF/Fantasy convention
Within the next five years:
Maintain my weight at 225 or lower
Work toward completing ASQ Fellow requirements
Compete in remaining Spartan events
Learn to play at least one musical instrument (leaning toward guitar, although I wouldn't mind starting over with the clarinet again)
Enroll in martial arts classes (judo, aikido, or shotokan karate) again
If feasible, begin either my doctorate or a community college teaching certificate
Lifetime:
Retire from government service and become a college professor
Travel to at least one of the following countries: Canada, Japan, UK, Greece, Italy, any Southern Hemisphere country (probably Australia, New Zealand, or South Africa)
Complete the Astronomical League's Southern Hemisphere observing list (either in person or via remote telescope)
Get a work of fiction published
Ambitious? Yes. But why not plan big? I've had enough of lowered expectations, especially from myself!
Tuesday, February 12, 2013
Tuesday, February 5, 2013
Week 4 Results: The Long And Winding Road
Last week's number: 324.6 pounds
This week's number: 321.6 pounds
Week-to-week loss: 3.0 poundsNet loss: 29.0 pounds
I didn't lose as much this week as I did last week, but I've been sick and haven't exercised as much as I should have. On the other hand, I have powered up the treadmill in the garage, so as of tomorrow night it's on!
Now that I'm actually addressing the issue, I've put some thought into just how and why I got this heavy in the first place. I do have some underlying medical issues (namely, low thyroid) that have exacerbated the problem, but ultimately it has to do with how I respond to stress. And there has been plenty of stress in my life the past several years!
Job stress is a major issue for me, and for those of you who think a government job is low-stress, try one sometime! I won't go into exhaustive detail but I will say that the head games, the pointless office politics, and the tension between the amount of work to do and the amount (or lack) of resources to do it with is at least as intense as any private employer. So yes, there's plenty of job stress to go around. I've seen it kill people--literally--and I've seen lots of my coworkers develop some pretty bad problems as a result.
Combine that with taking care of a family, which has its own stresses even on the best of days. And the financial issues of the past few years, as I mentioned in my last post, have created further stress on us. For most of the past seven years I've been commuting long-range, which has its own stress compounded by a resultant lack of time to do anything productive to relieve stress.
So what did I do? I've never smoked or used illegal drugs, and for most of my adult life I didn't drink. I've had two vices--caffeine and food--and of the two food provides a considerable emotional boost. No better stress reliever than tearing into a piece of beef jerky, or rending the meat from a chicken bone with my teeth...it releases something primal that can't otherwise be released without committing a major felony.
But this issue didn't start seven years ago, or even ten. It's been with me a long time. Being single was a huge stressor for me, particularly when all of my friends partnered up and left me in the cold. Trying to make ends meet with a job that didn't quite pay all the bills didn't help. And when you're low on money, you buy the cheap food, which is usually the worst food you can eat. But that's what I had.
So I ate. And I ate. And I ate. And in the meantime I watched my body deteriorate.
But no more!
One of the big challenges I have with this diet is how I will manage my eating--and my life--afterward. Now that I have the time and the resources, there is no excuse not to exercise. This in itself will be a great stress reliever and will help me extend the gains (losses?) I've made. And I need to change my relationship with food entirely. It is an addiction just as surely as tobacco or alcohol can be an addiction. I love food, and taken in moderation that's not a bad thing. After all, food is necessary for survival!
The kind of food, and the quantity, I need to reconsider drastically. I can no longer afford psychologically the all-you-can-eat buffet, or the extra value size anything. I need to learn how to enjoy smaller portion sizes, and to balance my food intake appropriately. The classes I go to Tuesday nights will teach me some of this, and intellectually I already knew a lot of it. The key is to transfer it from head knowledge to working knowledge. And, as with many things, that is a huge challenge for me. It will mean transforming my life at a fundamental level and perhaps sacrificing some things I've developed an unhealthy emotional attachment to.
In the end, however, the alternative is a coffin. And I have too much on my bucket list to wrap this up early!
This week's number: 321.6 pounds
Week-to-week loss: 3.0 poundsNet loss: 29.0 pounds
I didn't lose as much this week as I did last week, but I've been sick and haven't exercised as much as I should have. On the other hand, I have powered up the treadmill in the garage, so as of tomorrow night it's on!
Now that I'm actually addressing the issue, I've put some thought into just how and why I got this heavy in the first place. I do have some underlying medical issues (namely, low thyroid) that have exacerbated the problem, but ultimately it has to do with how I respond to stress. And there has been plenty of stress in my life the past several years!
Job stress is a major issue for me, and for those of you who think a government job is low-stress, try one sometime! I won't go into exhaustive detail but I will say that the head games, the pointless office politics, and the tension between the amount of work to do and the amount (or lack) of resources to do it with is at least as intense as any private employer. So yes, there's plenty of job stress to go around. I've seen it kill people--literally--and I've seen lots of my coworkers develop some pretty bad problems as a result.
Combine that with taking care of a family, which has its own stresses even on the best of days. And the financial issues of the past few years, as I mentioned in my last post, have created further stress on us. For most of the past seven years I've been commuting long-range, which has its own stress compounded by a resultant lack of time to do anything productive to relieve stress.
So what did I do? I've never smoked or used illegal drugs, and for most of my adult life I didn't drink. I've had two vices--caffeine and food--and of the two food provides a considerable emotional boost. No better stress reliever than tearing into a piece of beef jerky, or rending the meat from a chicken bone with my teeth...it releases something primal that can't otherwise be released without committing a major felony.
But this issue didn't start seven years ago, or even ten. It's been with me a long time. Being single was a huge stressor for me, particularly when all of my friends partnered up and left me in the cold. Trying to make ends meet with a job that didn't quite pay all the bills didn't help. And when you're low on money, you buy the cheap food, which is usually the worst food you can eat. But that's what I had.
So I ate. And I ate. And I ate. And in the meantime I watched my body deteriorate.
But no more!
One of the big challenges I have with this diet is how I will manage my eating--and my life--afterward. Now that I have the time and the resources, there is no excuse not to exercise. This in itself will be a great stress reliever and will help me extend the gains (losses?) I've made. And I need to change my relationship with food entirely. It is an addiction just as surely as tobacco or alcohol can be an addiction. I love food, and taken in moderation that's not a bad thing. After all, food is necessary for survival!
The kind of food, and the quantity, I need to reconsider drastically. I can no longer afford psychologically the all-you-can-eat buffet, or the extra value size anything. I need to learn how to enjoy smaller portion sizes, and to balance my food intake appropriately. The classes I go to Tuesday nights will teach me some of this, and intellectually I already knew a lot of it. The key is to transfer it from head knowledge to working knowledge. And, as with many things, that is a huge challenge for me. It will mean transforming my life at a fundamental level and perhaps sacrificing some things I've developed an unhealthy emotional attachment to.
In the end, however, the alternative is a coffin. And I have too much on my bucket list to wrap this up early!
Wednesday, January 30, 2013
Week 3 Results and Reflections
Last week's number: 331.0 pounds
This week's number: 324.6 pounds
Week-to-week loss: 6.4 pounds
Net loss: 26.0 pounds
Not quite as much as the last two weeks, but this has been a hard week. All of us have been sick, and I haven't stuck with my exercise routine as a result. Back on track tomorrow!
One thing that I was warned about with respect to this diet is depression. I've been fighting with it this past week, and it's been reflected everywhere: at home, at work, etc. It really has been eating at me and certain events today brought it to a head.
I've been told that writing will help clear my head, so here I am at the blog again. I need to get my emotions out someplace...
...but this is emphatically not it. There is enough self-absorbed emo crap on the Web that I don't need to be adding my pity party, or for that matter fueling it by doing so. (Seriously, folks, clinical depression is not a fun thing. I've been through it. If you need help, don't play around--get it.) Rather, in the spirit of Tony Robbins, I'm going to focus on some of the good things that have gone on for me this past week. So, only somewhat in order, here are Ten Great Things About The Last Week:
10) The bills are paid!
Like a lot of people, we got hurt rather badly during the financial crisis a few years ago. We made some poor decisions that bit us in the ass. Starting in 2008, however, we started working toward getting our debts under control and we finally finished that process with our state tax return last week. Aside from my student loan and the usual household expenses, we are debt free!
9) I've lost 6.4 pounds!
Yes, it's not as much as I would have liked, but 324.6 is the lowest my weight has been in at least five years. Stairs are no longer an issue for me, and I've been feeling the urge to run again (not that I'm going to try right now; I have a weak knee and I want to have quite a bit more weight off before I run any significant distance).
8) Clothes Make The Man
Those who know me know that I really don't like making a fuss over what I wear, or what other people wear. As long as one is covered in stuff that is 1) clean, 2) well-fitting, and 3) unlikely to provoke unwanted attention by the police I'm okay with it. However, I've come to the realization very late in life that other people do, in fact, make a big deal out of clothes and because they outnumber people like me approximately 999 to 1 they tend to call the shots. Hence, I should also pay attention to what I wear.
The weight loss is reclaiming lost territory in my closet. A pair of jeans I couldn't even come close to zipping up over the holidays is now baggy on me. I now have several pairs of dress slacks that I can wear again, and a shirt Sandy got me for Father's Day that turned out to be the wrong size is close to fitting. In another week I will not be able to get away without a belt under any circumstances. In another two weeks, the sport coat I bought for our honeymoon will fit the way it did back then and be suitable for more formal occasions. I'm pretty sure I can wear all my old uniforms again, but I haven't really tried yet. I am looking forward to wearing better stuff to work: I'm neither wealthy enough nor pretentious enough to want Armani-level stuff. Just some good suit separates, a few more dress shirts, maybe even a tie or two made later than 1994.
7) This Stuff:
Chinese Five Spice Powder makes the Optifast chicken soup so much better! Thanks Sandy for finding it! I've actually been delving into my ancient roots as a cook to punch up the soup I have on my diet. Spices, fortunately, have no caloric content and do a lot to help a monotonous diet. I was given a recipe book when I started the program and I've been experimenting. Garlic in particular helps out a lot and has other health benefits as well.
6) Man Cave Is Closer To Reality!
I've sectioned off about half the garage to function as a working area and library, the other half to hold exercise equipment. The project has languished since our move almost a year ago partly because of the insanely hot summer we had and partly because I just didn't have the energy to do anything about it due to my weight. With the weight loss, I've been able to attack it with a vengeance. I've emptied at least a dozen boxes; all books are properly shelved; and the workbench is almost cleared. It is possible to walk the length of the working area without dodging stuff, and I have light and electricity where I need it. Which was nice when I found Sandy's old Zima light and plugged it in. This of course brought back very fond memories of my next topic...
5) Babylon Five
This is still, after the original Star Trek, my favorite TV show of all time, and I just completed my DVD collection of the core series! This not only allowed me to dump several dozen VHS tapes, but ensured that I'll be able to enjoy the show long after our last functioning VCR (Vicker?) passes beyond the Veil. I still need to get the TV movies, The Lost Tales, and Crusade, but that's just a matter of time. As is all things. ;-)
The main plotline, to give the VERY simple thumbnail sketch, is about several races of mutually antagonistic aliens joining up with humanity to fight an ancient evil. It has a lot of parallels to what I'm going through right now, the ancient evil in this case being not only my weight but a number of other bad habits. And just as humanity has to deal with internal factions that could destroy it with good (or not-so-good) intentions, so I have to face my own inner struggles. And I must continue to keep on watch even after the battle is won, lest the evil rise again...
I can't emphasize how much this show means to me. In addition to being a damned fine TV show, a very large percentage of my friends I found as a direct or proximate result of B5 fandom. It's a bit much to say any TV show makes a person who he or she is (and if that's the case, it's the sign of a very unbalanced personality) but this one had a big hand in it.
This is not to say, however, that my tastes have not evolved in the 15 years since the show ended its run. I have managed to hook up with a newer group of fans of a franchise that still continues strong to this day. To wit...
4) The Royal Manticoran Navy!
For those of you who aren't familiar with David Weber's Honor Harrington series, it is quite simply the best military science fiction in print today. It starts with a simple premise: what would C.S. Forester's Horatio Hornblower series (another favorite of mine) look like in space thousands of years from now, as opposed to the ocean 200 years ago. From there one gets all kinds of political intrigue, enough weapons and tech porn to satisfy even the hardest Tom Clancy junkie (which I was at one point) and a whole raft of both heroes and villains who manage to get up off the page and make themselves alive. The titular hero being an intelligent woman who takes no crap from anyone doesn't hurt in my eyes either--brings back my adolescent crush on Ripley in Aliens (hmmmmm...)
I found the fan group on Facebook a couple of years ago and joined out of curiosity, even though I hadn't read the books in quite a while (and have missed out on several new ones). Since then I've run into a whole rogues' gallery of hardcore science fiction fans online that have renewed my interest in the series and who actually get 90% of my jokes. ;-) I've started rereading the series again (when I'm not reading stuff that has the word 'quality' in the title someplace) from the beginning. Eventually I will take the tests and rank up, too. Hell, eventually I'll meet some of these folks in person!
3) Friends generally
I have been impressed and quite frankly astonished by the outpouring of support I've received since starting this odyssey of mine three weeks ago. I have gotten comments from people I only know as a string of ones and zeroes in a data feed that have been very encouraging, and that means a lot. Whether you're in meatspace or cyberspace, if you're my friend, you're my friend. I can't say any more than 'thank you.'
2) My Family
I absolutely cannot do anything I'm doing right now--work, school, this weight loss program--without the unwavering and constant support of my family generally and my wife and kids in particular. They have been patient with me as I've fought the cravings, rode out the mood swings, struggled with being scatter-brained, and dealt with all the other side effects of a very-low calorie diet. Sandy will be joining me in just a few weeks; if you're reading this, milady, you can count on my utmost support! And no, Mom, we won't forget to feed the kids! The odds of anyone in this house starving are about as good as those of Hitler and Stalin returning from the grave and signing on as WWE bad guys. I love you, kids, for being patient with your Daddy. And I love you, Sandy, for your usual forbearance with regard to my not fitting on the bell curve. Thanks again!
(and as a subpoint to this one, I've learned that my nephew and his wife are being transferred to within a day's drive of us. Shiny!)
1) My faith
Yes, I am being slightly irreverent here. After all, if Jesus were to play hockey He'd play center or wing, not defense. No neutral zone trap for Him--"be ye hot or cold, lest I spit you from My mouth." Getting a rich man into Heaven may be like threading a camel through the eye of a needle, but you know He can slap shot that puck through Satan's five-hole with all power and authority! And just look at that epic playoff beard! You know He's going to skate with the Cup at the end (the book even tells us He will, metaphorically).
The ability to laugh at oneself is a sign of mental stability, right?
If I could not do what I'm doing now without my family, I would never have gotten to this point without my faith. I am by no means a perfect Christian, and I will admit that to anyone who cares to bring it up. Let's take that off the table now. What being a Christian means is to be keenly aware of your own shortcomings, and not afraid to admit them because God's grace covers you. That's why I've been more open here than I usually am.
Grace, however, does not excuse us from actually doing something about our shortcomings. "To him who knows what is right, and does not do it, this is sin." The right thing is to mitigate or outright correct one's shortcomings, not hide behind them. And I've been doing that for far too long. Life is very short, and while I do not know what God's specific plan is for me (nobody can know that until it's all been spelled out) or how long I really have left to accomplish it, I accomplish it much better if I take care of myself in every dimension--physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. And that's where I'm headed with this. I want to leave behind good in the world, not neutral indifference because I was too lazy to get up off my ass and do something.
And with 26 pounds off my frame, it's a lot easier to get up off my ass. My weight loss is due to exercise, a medically-monitored diet, and damned good health insurance. God, however, brought all of these elements together and said, "It's up to you!"
And so it is. On to the next week!
This week's number: 324.6 pounds
Week-to-week loss: 6.4 pounds
Net loss: 26.0 pounds
Not quite as much as the last two weeks, but this has been a hard week. All of us have been sick, and I haven't stuck with my exercise routine as a result. Back on track tomorrow!
One thing that I was warned about with respect to this diet is depression. I've been fighting with it this past week, and it's been reflected everywhere: at home, at work, etc. It really has been eating at me and certain events today brought it to a head.
I've been told that writing will help clear my head, so here I am at the blog again. I need to get my emotions out someplace...
...but this is emphatically not it. There is enough self-absorbed emo crap on the Web that I don't need to be adding my pity party, or for that matter fueling it by doing so. (Seriously, folks, clinical depression is not a fun thing. I've been through it. If you need help, don't play around--get it.) Rather, in the spirit of Tony Robbins, I'm going to focus on some of the good things that have gone on for me this past week. So, only somewhat in order, here are Ten Great Things About The Last Week:
10) The bills are paid!
Like a lot of people, we got hurt rather badly during the financial crisis a few years ago. We made some poor decisions that bit us in the ass. Starting in 2008, however, we started working toward getting our debts under control and we finally finished that process with our state tax return last week. Aside from my student loan and the usual household expenses, we are debt free!
9) I've lost 6.4 pounds!
Yes, it's not as much as I would have liked, but 324.6 is the lowest my weight has been in at least five years. Stairs are no longer an issue for me, and I've been feeling the urge to run again (not that I'm going to try right now; I have a weak knee and I want to have quite a bit more weight off before I run any significant distance).
8) Clothes Make The Man
Those who know me know that I really don't like making a fuss over what I wear, or what other people wear. As long as one is covered in stuff that is 1) clean, 2) well-fitting, and 3) unlikely to provoke unwanted attention by the police I'm okay with it. However, I've come to the realization very late in life that other people do, in fact, make a big deal out of clothes and because they outnumber people like me approximately 999 to 1 they tend to call the shots. Hence, I should also pay attention to what I wear.
The weight loss is reclaiming lost territory in my closet. A pair of jeans I couldn't even come close to zipping up over the holidays is now baggy on me. I now have several pairs of dress slacks that I can wear again, and a shirt Sandy got me for Father's Day that turned out to be the wrong size is close to fitting. In another week I will not be able to get away without a belt under any circumstances. In another two weeks, the sport coat I bought for our honeymoon will fit the way it did back then and be suitable for more formal occasions. I'm pretty sure I can wear all my old uniforms again, but I haven't really tried yet. I am looking forward to wearing better stuff to work: I'm neither wealthy enough nor pretentious enough to want Armani-level stuff. Just some good suit separates, a few more dress shirts, maybe even a tie or two made later than 1994.
7) This Stuff:
Chinese Five Spice Powder makes the Optifast chicken soup so much better! Thanks Sandy for finding it! I've actually been delving into my ancient roots as a cook to punch up the soup I have on my diet. Spices, fortunately, have no caloric content and do a lot to help a monotonous diet. I was given a recipe book when I started the program and I've been experimenting. Garlic in particular helps out a lot and has other health benefits as well.
6) Man Cave Is Closer To Reality!
I've sectioned off about half the garage to function as a working area and library, the other half to hold exercise equipment. The project has languished since our move almost a year ago partly because of the insanely hot summer we had and partly because I just didn't have the energy to do anything about it due to my weight. With the weight loss, I've been able to attack it with a vengeance. I've emptied at least a dozen boxes; all books are properly shelved; and the workbench is almost cleared. It is possible to walk the length of the working area without dodging stuff, and I have light and electricity where I need it. Which was nice when I found Sandy's old Zima light and plugged it in. This of course brought back very fond memories of my next topic...
5) Babylon Five
This is still, after the original Star Trek, my favorite TV show of all time, and I just completed my DVD collection of the core series! This not only allowed me to dump several dozen VHS tapes, but ensured that I'll be able to enjoy the show long after our last functioning VCR (Vicker?) passes beyond the Veil. I still need to get the TV movies, The Lost Tales, and Crusade, but that's just a matter of time. As is all things. ;-)
The main plotline, to give the VERY simple thumbnail sketch, is about several races of mutually antagonistic aliens joining up with humanity to fight an ancient evil. It has a lot of parallels to what I'm going through right now, the ancient evil in this case being not only my weight but a number of other bad habits. And just as humanity has to deal with internal factions that could destroy it with good (or not-so-good) intentions, so I have to face my own inner struggles. And I must continue to keep on watch even after the battle is won, lest the evil rise again...
I can't emphasize how much this show means to me. In addition to being a damned fine TV show, a very large percentage of my friends I found as a direct or proximate result of B5 fandom. It's a bit much to say any TV show makes a person who he or she is (and if that's the case, it's the sign of a very unbalanced personality) but this one had a big hand in it.
This is not to say, however, that my tastes have not evolved in the 15 years since the show ended its run. I have managed to hook up with a newer group of fans of a franchise that still continues strong to this day. To wit...
4) The Royal Manticoran Navy!
For those of you who aren't familiar with David Weber's Honor Harrington series, it is quite simply the best military science fiction in print today. It starts with a simple premise: what would C.S. Forester's Horatio Hornblower series (another favorite of mine) look like in space thousands of years from now, as opposed to the ocean 200 years ago. From there one gets all kinds of political intrigue, enough weapons and tech porn to satisfy even the hardest Tom Clancy junkie (which I was at one point) and a whole raft of both heroes and villains who manage to get up off the page and make themselves alive. The titular hero being an intelligent woman who takes no crap from anyone doesn't hurt in my eyes either--brings back my adolescent crush on Ripley in Aliens (hmmmmm...)
I found the fan group on Facebook a couple of years ago and joined out of curiosity, even though I hadn't read the books in quite a while (and have missed out on several new ones). Since then I've run into a whole rogues' gallery of hardcore science fiction fans online that have renewed my interest in the series and who actually get 90% of my jokes. ;-) I've started rereading the series again (when I'm not reading stuff that has the word 'quality' in the title someplace) from the beginning. Eventually I will take the tests and rank up, too. Hell, eventually I'll meet some of these folks in person!
3) Friends generally
I have been impressed and quite frankly astonished by the outpouring of support I've received since starting this odyssey of mine three weeks ago. I have gotten comments from people I only know as a string of ones and zeroes in a data feed that have been very encouraging, and that means a lot. Whether you're in meatspace or cyberspace, if you're my friend, you're my friend. I can't say any more than 'thank you.'
2) My Family
I absolutely cannot do anything I'm doing right now--work, school, this weight loss program--without the unwavering and constant support of my family generally and my wife and kids in particular. They have been patient with me as I've fought the cravings, rode out the mood swings, struggled with being scatter-brained, and dealt with all the other side effects of a very-low calorie diet. Sandy will be joining me in just a few weeks; if you're reading this, milady, you can count on my utmost support! And no, Mom, we won't forget to feed the kids! The odds of anyone in this house starving are about as good as those of Hitler and Stalin returning from the grave and signing on as WWE bad guys. I love you, kids, for being patient with your Daddy. And I love you, Sandy, for your usual forbearance with regard to my not fitting on the bell curve. Thanks again!
(and as a subpoint to this one, I've learned that my nephew and his wife are being transferred to within a day's drive of us. Shiny!)
1) My faith
Yes, I am being slightly irreverent here. After all, if Jesus were to play hockey He'd play center or wing, not defense. No neutral zone trap for Him--"be ye hot or cold, lest I spit you from My mouth." Getting a rich man into Heaven may be like threading a camel through the eye of a needle, but you know He can slap shot that puck through Satan's five-hole with all power and authority! And just look at that epic playoff beard! You know He's going to skate with the Cup at the end (the book even tells us He will, metaphorically).
The ability to laugh at oneself is a sign of mental stability, right?
If I could not do what I'm doing now without my family, I would never have gotten to this point without my faith. I am by no means a perfect Christian, and I will admit that to anyone who cares to bring it up. Let's take that off the table now. What being a Christian means is to be keenly aware of your own shortcomings, and not afraid to admit them because God's grace covers you. That's why I've been more open here than I usually am.
Grace, however, does not excuse us from actually doing something about our shortcomings. "To him who knows what is right, and does not do it, this is sin." The right thing is to mitigate or outright correct one's shortcomings, not hide behind them. And I've been doing that for far too long. Life is very short, and while I do not know what God's specific plan is for me (nobody can know that until it's all been spelled out) or how long I really have left to accomplish it, I accomplish it much better if I take care of myself in every dimension--physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. And that's where I'm headed with this. I want to leave behind good in the world, not neutral indifference because I was too lazy to get up off my ass and do something.
And with 26 pounds off my frame, it's a lot easier to get up off my ass. My weight loss is due to exercise, a medically-monitored diet, and damned good health insurance. God, however, brought all of these elements together and said, "It's up to you!"
And so it is. On to the next week!
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
Week Two Results
Last week's number: 339.6 pounds
This week's number: 331.0 pounds (my lowest weight in two years)
Week-to-week loss: 8.6 pounds
Net loss: 19.6 pounds
I am very encouraged by these numbers! This diet has not been easy, but I am committed to it.
I am starting to notice more differences. My mind is becoming much more active--in the past there have been some days when I've felt like my thoughts were swimming in mud, with the occasional inability to actually stop them. Now the sluggishness seems to be going away.
Physically I feel better as well. Tonight I climbed the stairs to check in with the nurse, and my blood pressure stayed within normal limits afterward. I feel like I have more energy (that is, when I'm not awakened at 4:00 AM by my son). My clothes are fitting better, and I'm now able to wear a pair of dress shoes I hadn't been able to wear in at least two years. My skin is even starting to feel different--not quite as stretched tight, and really itchy sometimes.
My goal here is to lose as much weight as I can without having to resort to surgery. From there, I will be able to exercise safely (right now it's not very good for my heart or my joints to really push myself the way I'd like--but that's changing!) That said, I am trying to get more exercise in my daily routine.
This past week has been challenging in that regard, particularly at home. I am now taking care of Sandy and both kids as they recover from the bug-du-jour. I really, really, really hope I don't get sick. I am going to try and vary topics here a little bit, starting tomorrow night. Stay tuned!
This week's number: 331.0 pounds (my lowest weight in two years)
Week-to-week loss: 8.6 pounds
Net loss: 19.6 pounds
I am very encouraged by these numbers! This diet has not been easy, but I am committed to it.
I am starting to notice more differences. My mind is becoming much more active--in the past there have been some days when I've felt like my thoughts were swimming in mud, with the occasional inability to actually stop them. Now the sluggishness seems to be going away.
Physically I feel better as well. Tonight I climbed the stairs to check in with the nurse, and my blood pressure stayed within normal limits afterward. I feel like I have more energy (that is, when I'm not awakened at 4:00 AM by my son). My clothes are fitting better, and I'm now able to wear a pair of dress shoes I hadn't been able to wear in at least two years. My skin is even starting to feel different--not quite as stretched tight, and really itchy sometimes.
My goal here is to lose as much weight as I can without having to resort to surgery. From there, I will be able to exercise safely (right now it's not very good for my heart or my joints to really push myself the way I'd like--but that's changing!) That said, I am trying to get more exercise in my daily routine.
This past week has been challenging in that regard, particularly at home. I am now taking care of Sandy and both kids as they recover from the bug-du-jour. I really, really, really hope I don't get sick. I am going to try and vary topics here a little bit, starting tomorrow night. Stay tuned!
Friday, January 18, 2013
Getting Into The Groove
Now 9 days into the diet, I'm actually feeling pretty good! The headaches have mostly stopped, and I'm even keeping the cravings under control (although seeing everyone's food porn online isn't helping matters!) Even now I restrain myself from going after what little junk food we have left in the house. I don't want to take any chances and blow it!
I've been trying to build exercise into my daily routine. At the size I've gotten to, anything too strenuous is likely to hurt me right now, so I'm working up slowly. I climb the stairs at work--all of them--three times a day now. At first I was really winded and dizzy; now I'm just a little short of breath. I did a walk around the block earlier this week and I want to do it again soon. And this weekend I'll finally have the garage under control so I can use the treadmill and exercise bike. Not to mention my own little workspace where I can grind out stuff like this blog. :-)
A word on junk food: not too long ago some comments were made to the effect of why we allow the stuff at all for our children. I'll address that in a little detail here: we're human. Both of our children are in perfect physical health and at the right developmental milestones for their respective ages. They do get balanced meals with fruits and vegetables (both Alex and Morgan are fiends for fresh fruit!) But that doesn't mean we don't let them have fun sometimes with candy or macaroni and cheese or other such stuff. We look out for their well-being probably more than we do our own (that's been part of the problem for Sandy and me). Sandy in particular is putting a lot of effort into making sure both kids are happy and healthy and she does not need to be lectured on what she should or should not be doing. Not all families are capable of homeschooling, becoming localvores, sewing all of their own clothes, etc., etc. And I take particular exception to the so-called 'supermoms' who try to make her feel badly about it. Maybe I do myself no favors inserting myself into female social posturing, but as a husband it is my duty and honor to protect my wife. And I'd stand up to Satan himself if that's what it took!
Okay, enough of that. I am dreaming of the day when I can have real food again...but not too much. I don't want to get back to where I am now. I want to get to a place I've never been before!
I've been trying to build exercise into my daily routine. At the size I've gotten to, anything too strenuous is likely to hurt me right now, so I'm working up slowly. I climb the stairs at work--all of them--three times a day now. At first I was really winded and dizzy; now I'm just a little short of breath. I did a walk around the block earlier this week and I want to do it again soon. And this weekend I'll finally have the garage under control so I can use the treadmill and exercise bike. Not to mention my own little workspace where I can grind out stuff like this blog. :-)
A word on junk food: not too long ago some comments were made to the effect of why we allow the stuff at all for our children. I'll address that in a little detail here: we're human. Both of our children are in perfect physical health and at the right developmental milestones for their respective ages. They do get balanced meals with fruits and vegetables (both Alex and Morgan are fiends for fresh fruit!) But that doesn't mean we don't let them have fun sometimes with candy or macaroni and cheese or other such stuff. We look out for their well-being probably more than we do our own (that's been part of the problem for Sandy and me). Sandy in particular is putting a lot of effort into making sure both kids are happy and healthy and she does not need to be lectured on what she should or should not be doing. Not all families are capable of homeschooling, becoming localvores, sewing all of their own clothes, etc., etc. And I take particular exception to the so-called 'supermoms' who try to make her feel badly about it. Maybe I do myself no favors inserting myself into female social posturing, but as a husband it is my duty and honor to protect my wife. And I'd stand up to Satan himself if that's what it took!
Okay, enough of that. I am dreaming of the day when I can have real food again...but not too much. I don't want to get back to where I am now. I want to get to a place I've never been before!
Wednesday, January 16, 2013
Week One Results
"Today is your victory over yourself of yesterday. Tomorrow is your victory over lesser men." --Miyamoto Musashi, The Book of Five Rings
Last week's number: 350.6 pounds
This week's number: 339.6 pounds
Week-to-week loss: 11 pounds
Net loss: 11 pounds
I'm not proud of these numbers. But that was the old me. I am winning the victory over myself of yesterday. Tomorrow I will win the victory over myself of today.
I am very, very encouraged by these numbers, but also a little cautious. As much as 70% of this figure could be water weight. However, I have been keeping myself hydrated above and beyond what the program calls for. I've also been exercising more: I did my walk around the block the other night, and I've been climbing stairs just for the exercise. I have a weekly goal of climbing all three staircases at work three times during the day--that's eighteen flights of stairs, up and down, every day. And this week I'm making it a point to clear the garage so I can set up my exercise equipment. I don't want rain or cold weather to stop me from getting in a workout.
I haven't talked a lot about this on this blog, but I'm also working on another challenge: after a 15-year absence, I have returned to graduate school starting last September. The units I had before are no longer good, so I have to restart my degree program from scratch. Back then, I weighed at least 80 pounds less, I was single, and had fairly low-level job responsibilities, so pouring all of myself into my classes was easier. Now I'm older, married with two kids, and have much greater responsibilities at work. It's already hard enough. I'm hoping this diet doesn't interfere with my classes, because I really do want to finish my MS by next year! I'm told it won't, but I've had such poor luck with both losing weight and finishing graduate school that combining the two doesn't seem like the best prospect. But then again, maybe the challenges will cancel each other out. ;-)
My degree will be in quality assurance--appropriately enough, since that's also my job. A lot of the principles of the quality profession also apply to weight loss. Kaizen, the notion of making gradual but continuous improvements as the most surefire way to permanent change applies for most people, just as it does for most organizations. Unfortunately in my case I don't have the luxury of making gradual changes. My weight is dangerously high, and I put myself and my family at risk by not taking drastic action. I am at severe danger for a heart attack, stroke, or even a catastrophic injury to my back, knees, or hips. So I'm reengineering my life. I'm paying attention to what I eat, how I behave during the day, and what I'm thinking. I find myself getting so absorbed in tasks that I forget to get up and move--a dangerous thing now that I'm in an office job. I now make it a point to get up and move, just to clear my head and get the blood moving.
More to the point, I have trouble maintaining focus sometimes. I get easily distracted, which makes it very hard to concentrate on complex assignments. I would love to put on earphones and tune out the world so I can work, but I also don't want to be hung with an antisocial label (I struggle with that one as it is). I'll talk about that particular battle more in a later post.
This isn't the end. It's the beginning. One week down, 15 to go!
Last week's number: 350.6 pounds
This week's number: 339.6 pounds
Week-to-week loss: 11 pounds
Net loss: 11 pounds
I'm not proud of these numbers. But that was the old me. I am winning the victory over myself of yesterday. Tomorrow I will win the victory over myself of today.
I am very, very encouraged by these numbers, but also a little cautious. As much as 70% of this figure could be water weight. However, I have been keeping myself hydrated above and beyond what the program calls for. I've also been exercising more: I did my walk around the block the other night, and I've been climbing stairs just for the exercise. I have a weekly goal of climbing all three staircases at work three times during the day--that's eighteen flights of stairs, up and down, every day. And this week I'm making it a point to clear the garage so I can set up my exercise equipment. I don't want rain or cold weather to stop me from getting in a workout.
I haven't talked a lot about this on this blog, but I'm also working on another challenge: after a 15-year absence, I have returned to graduate school starting last September. The units I had before are no longer good, so I have to restart my degree program from scratch. Back then, I weighed at least 80 pounds less, I was single, and had fairly low-level job responsibilities, so pouring all of myself into my classes was easier. Now I'm older, married with two kids, and have much greater responsibilities at work. It's already hard enough. I'm hoping this diet doesn't interfere with my classes, because I really do want to finish my MS by next year! I'm told it won't, but I've had such poor luck with both losing weight and finishing graduate school that combining the two doesn't seem like the best prospect. But then again, maybe the challenges will cancel each other out. ;-)
My degree will be in quality assurance--appropriately enough, since that's also my job. A lot of the principles of the quality profession also apply to weight loss. Kaizen, the notion of making gradual but continuous improvements as the most surefire way to permanent change applies for most people, just as it does for most organizations. Unfortunately in my case I don't have the luxury of making gradual changes. My weight is dangerously high, and I put myself and my family at risk by not taking drastic action. I am at severe danger for a heart attack, stroke, or even a catastrophic injury to my back, knees, or hips. So I'm reengineering my life. I'm paying attention to what I eat, how I behave during the day, and what I'm thinking. I find myself getting so absorbed in tasks that I forget to get up and move--a dangerous thing now that I'm in an office job. I now make it a point to get up and move, just to clear my head and get the blood moving.
More to the point, I have trouble maintaining focus sometimes. I get easily distracted, which makes it very hard to concentrate on complex assignments. I would love to put on earphones and tune out the world so I can work, but I also don't want to be hung with an antisocial label (I struggle with that one as it is). I'll talk about that particular battle more in a later post.
This isn't the end. It's the beginning. One week down, 15 to go!
Sunday, January 13, 2013
Well, today was a rough one!
Day 5 and I'm really starting to feel it now. Maybe it's because today was the most physically active day I've had since I started this diet. I moved the Christmas decorations back to our storage locker (which involved lots of loading and unloading as well as climbing stairs) and helped Sandy clean out the garage afterward. That put me close to 8000 steps today! I need to break 10000 to be guaranteed real weight loss, so I'll still continue to push.
Still, smells, sights, and even comments about food are becoming more and more tempting. I just about lost it when Alex had a piece of chocolate after dinner tonight! At least three times I was sorely tempted to break the diet, but I'm not going to. Other than the Communion cracker I had this morning at church I've consumed nothing not on the plan since early Wednesday morning. I've gotten more temperamental, which I regret.
Unfortunately my thoughts are getting a little fuzzier, so the epic discourse I had planned for tonight will have to wait until later. But I will say this: the sacrifice will be worth it! I can't wait until Tuesday to see how much I've lost so far!
Still, smells, sights, and even comments about food are becoming more and more tempting. I just about lost it when Alex had a piece of chocolate after dinner tonight! At least three times I was sorely tempted to break the diet, but I'm not going to. Other than the Communion cracker I had this morning at church I've consumed nothing not on the plan since early Wednesday morning. I've gotten more temperamental, which I regret.
Unfortunately my thoughts are getting a little fuzzier, so the epic discourse I had planned for tonight will have to wait until later. But I will say this: the sacrifice will be worth it! I can't wait until Tuesday to see how much I've lost so far!
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